


Nurse Church

by In_love_with_too_many_fandoms



Category: Red vs. Blue
Genre: Anger, Angry Love, Caboose gets sick, Caboose headcanon, Church comes to the rescue, Cute, Friendship, Oneshot, POV Third Person, Platonic Love, Platonic Relationships, Sickness, The true meaning of friendship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-02
Updated: 2016-12-02
Packaged: 2018-09-03 17:53:39
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,015
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8724097
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/In_love_with_too_many_fandoms/pseuds/In_love_with_too_many_fandoms
Summary: When Caboose gets sick, Church is the one who needs to take care of him.





	

“Achoo!” Caboose’s sneeze shook the entirety of blue base. Church sighed and scurried from one side of the base to the other. “Church!” Caboose shouted, sounding very nasally. “I need another tissue.”

Church was already one step ahead of him. He had the entire box in his hands on the way over to where Caboose was lying down. When he arrived there, the sight he saw still surprised him. Church had never seen Caboose without his armor on, and here he was in full glory. He had brown hair and brown eyes. He had freckles covering his face. He looked like a normal, every day guy, yet he was still so stupid. 

He was lying down in bed with two blankets covering his entire body. Church held the tissue box in front of Caboose’s hand. “Here you go, buddy.”

Caboose grabbed a tissue and then gasped. “You called me ‘buddy’! Does this mean I am your friend?” Caboose held the tissue up to his nose and blew hard. He sounded like a cross between a fog horn a pregnant elephant giving birth. He tossed the dirty tissue on top of the pile that was slowly beginning to take up the entire corner of the room. Seriously, there were enough tissues to make kindling to burn a small village.

“Yes, Caboose. I am your friend. Now get to sleep.” Church made to leave the room, but luck was not on his side.

“Church? Can you take my temperature again?”

Church sighed. He turned around and walked back to the sickly blue. He placed the tissues on the table next to the bed and took the thermometer off of it. He placed it underneath the other man’s tongue and left it there. Staring at the table, an idea dawned on him. “Wait a minute! Why do I keep running back and forth with tissues when I can just leave them on this table?”

Caboose stayed silent, due to the thermometer in his mouth. It beeped, so he couldn’t stay silent for long. “What is my temperature, Church?”

Church stared at it for a second. “It’s 100.7.” He turned off the thermometer and placed it back on the table. “Get some sleep, Caboose. You need it so you can get better soon.” Church turned to leave again, but Caboose spoke to him again.

“Can you tell me a story?”

Church stopped dead in his tracks. “What did you just ask me to do?”

Caboose cleared his throat. “I want you to tell me a story. I’m not tired, and stories usually put me to sleep.” Church went to decline, but Caboose began to beg. “Please, Church. Just one little story, I promise.”

Church, feeling defeated, turned back around to look at the sick man-child. He walked over to the edge of the bed and sat down on the floor. “All right, Caboose. I will tell you one story. What do you want it to be about?”

Caboose clapped his hands together gleefully. He looked so excited to hear a story from his best friend. “I want it to be about two animals that become best friends.” 

“What animals?”

Without skipping a beat, Caboose shouted, “A unicorn and a pineapple!”

Church facepalmed himself. ‘Why did I agree to do this?’ he thought to himself. Church breathed in deeply for three counts and breathed out for seven counts before he spoke to his fellow blue. “Caboose, can you please choose a real animal and a living thing that is not a fruit.”

Caboose pouted, but after a minute, came to a compromise. “Can I keep the unicorn but change the pineapple to an actual animal.”

Church groaned. “Sure. What’s the other animal?”

“A frog.” Caboose beamed down at Church.

Church thought a moment about what the story was going to be. After he got the plot down, he began to tell it. “Once upon a time, there was beautiful unicorn and a very ugly frog. The frog had warts covering it’s body while the unicorn had butterflies surrounding it. One day, the unicorn came across the frog in the meadow. The frog told the unicorn that if she kissed him, he would turn into a wonderful unicorn prince…”

“Wrong!” Caboose interrupted. “That’s not how the story goes.”

“Then how does the story go that I am making up right on the spot go, Caboose?”

“The genders are swapped.”

“Do you want to tell it, then?”

“Okay, but you have to lie down.” Church laid down on the cold, hard ground. “Okay good.” Caboose cleared his throat. “Once upon a time, a unicorn prince ruled over the land. One day, he came across a frog that had bumpy spots. The unicorn asked the frog what the spots were, and the frog told him they were her imperfections. The unicorn was amazed that any animal could be different, because he was so perfect. The unicorn prince then accepted the frog and they became best friends. The end.” Caboose waited a minute before speaking again. “Did you like my story, Church?”

Caboose looked down at Church, who had fallen asleep. Caboose sneezed again, yet he didn’t wake him. He took a tissue, blew his nose, and still Church did not wake up. Caboose threw the tissue on top of the pile.

“I know you are asleep,” Caboose whispered, “But I wanted to say thank you. You decided to take care of me while I was sick. Not many people would do that for me. That’s why we are best friends, Church. We are best friends forever. You sounded angry, but I know you were angry with love.” Caboose glanced at Church’s sleeping body. “Yes, that is a thing. Obviously it is, because you always are, even when I am sick. You took care of me, and you were angry at me. That’s how you know we have a true friendship. Thank you, bestest friend. Thank you, Nurse Church.” Caboose nestled his body under the mountain of blankets. He fell asleep almost immediately, knowing his best friend was asleep right next to him.


End file.
